Women to Be Praised and Those Held in Contempt - Reflections on Feminine Worth

Nefzawi does not shy away from contrast. After praising women of vitality and sensuality, he turns to those he believes diminish desire — women who are cold, neglectful of their bodies, sharp-tongued without warmth, or unresponsive in intimacy.

These passages can feel harsh to modern ears. They reflect the patriarchal lens of their time. Yet they also offer a mirror. What kind of woman does Nefzawi say awakens lasting desire? One who is generous with her pleasure, attentive to her own cleanliness and fragrance, playful, warm, and present. One who does not withhold herself out of resentment or indifference.

For the sovereign woman, this is not an invitation to perform for male approval. It is an invitation to ask: Where am I withholding my own vitality? Where have I abandoned my own garden - my scent, my pleasure, my responsiveness - in order to survive or appease?

The women Nefzawi praises are not passive. They are abundant. They enjoy their bodies. They bring warmth and moisture and life into union. They are not diminished versions of themselves.

In reading these chapters, I am reminded that sovereignty includes the courage to cultivate our own garden — to perfume ourselves for our own delight first, to remain responsive to genuine connection, and to refuse the slow deadening that resentment or disconnection can bring.

The garden does not bloom for those who neglect it. This is as true for our inner lives as it was in Nefzawi’s time.

As we continue through "The Perfumed Garden", let us carry both the praise and the warning gently. Not as judgment, but as ancient encouragement to tend our own sensuality with care and fierceness.

A note from the editor

These contrasts in the text invite honesty. May we choose to become the women who praise life with our bodies and our presence.